PiCtuRE of My GRaduAtIoN....

Some of great moment in my lifes.. anyway thanks ayah for the base that u build 4 me.. without the strong base maybe i wont be able to achieve thiz moment and for ibu thankz a lot to be a great supporters in my life till now.. u r my love...

ConVocation UMP 2009~3rd oct

waa... akhirnyer stelah 4 taun berhempas pulas dkat uMP in electronic eng akhirnya grad jugak.. tpi ap bleh buat 2nd class holder......... tu la sruh blja btul2 tk mau... tu yg mampu..

actually masa convo byak sedih dr happy... since bla time convo ayah tk de.. byangkan org yg spatutnyer masuk to watch me during the graduation is not arround.. sedih giler.... pastu sbab tk kje there is no money for me to spend with my family especially my ibu.. my dearest ibu.. ibu i need to thankz u alot.. there is nothing that i can repay u... u always be on my side.... so as ti me goes by u still my dearest person..

then as usual got a bouquet from ibu n aflower from uni n wawa sent by daus... thankz all... not 4gotten that is a dress from a friend( ex pres 4/508) sent by courier... huuuhuhuuhu.. tk de lagi dlam sejarah hidup dpat adiah baju....anyway thankz.... so after grad kalau tak keje dgan rasminyer == penganggur.. really hate that name.. insya ALLAh it wont be long...

penNAtian SatU peNYeKsaAn...

semalam mimpi klakar sangat.. huhuuhuuu...mimpi raja pakai serba kuning then excited giler nk tangkap gambar dgn family.. klakar.. than bla blang dgn ibu konon2 nk dpt great news.. huhuuuhuu.. hope so!!
regarding to the title penantian satu penyiksaan, be4 thiz i had tell that i really had waiting.. so ap yg dpat dikatakan penantian satu penyiksaan. Penantian yg tak de kepastian.. at the end mgkin happy or sad??? Thiz all d matters we needs to face when dealing with goverment institution, too much birokrasi, toomuch procedures........ but utk kata menyesal amik biasiswa ni masa study tk spatutnyer ad sbb as muslim kna redha dgn kputusan yg dh buat.. logiknyer kalau nk menyesal pn ap yg bleh buat time can't turn back..... so pa yg spatutnyer buat sabar n redha dgan ap decission yg di ambil... Ap bleh buat bdoa dgn YG ESA di permudahkan segala urusan....

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no title for this new post... saja jer.. nk emo... juz teringat kata2 yg selalu ad dlm ceramah " selalu muhasabah diri or 4 me the exact meaning is analyze myself..." lately sjak dh tak keje i got new interest playing Sudoku, kakuro and others maths puzzles.. actually thats me.. suka bnda yg kna fikir scara kritikal..since got this times and chance try to use it.. in d same time masa main bnda ni emosi tk brapa nk stabil sebb incident yg tk bleh nk lupa tu... so as long playing the puzzle i find out my self . i 'm one of d person yg scared to take risk... sbb once nk ltak nombor2 dlm kotak tu smpai satu limit yg stuck i still tk brani nk try ltak sebarang no... so juz let it blanks and take rest sampai as idea yg confident btul walaupun atlast its wrong,,, so conclusion somehow in certain cases i takut nk take challenge sebab takut fail.....thats me.. So thats the same things happen in my real life especially in relationships , takut nk kawan dan pcaya dgn kawan sendiri since takut one time org2 ni akan mengkhianati kita..(as its happened to me be4) dn kadg2 bila bkawan rasanyer tk smua kawan yg ikhlas nk bkawan ad yg bkawan untuk interest sendiri ad motif sendiri... so once their mission completed or failed then they will turn away from me.. ITS THAT WHAT WE CALL FRENZ??? i hve try to fade away this issues be4 and make frenz hope i can build a relation make real friends ( since frenz supposely has very nice and best meaning to person).. but at last the same things happens when i think i've makes good frenz but at last i realized ,they have their own mission makes me as frenz its shown when i seems not shows any interest in their mission they turn away from me...... but this time i dont know to refer d person as they or he/she, may be because cause of a person all of them turn away from me.. or may be all of they are same.....
So now what else can I hope from d relation... but i will try to build the Positive part in me i must dare to take risks and challenges in life eventhough not in d relations but maybe in carier.. Hope so..

i,me,myself....

huuhuhu... bru ceria skit blog ni..sbab d owner of d blog ni person yg ska bt kerja ikut mood... yup thats my bad habit.. bt keje ikut mood.. once rsa nk cantikkan blog i'll try to make it till d end.. but to start ni all depends on my moods.. tk der mood nk surf internet pn mlazzzzz........ my life?? still not working.. eventhough my previous company (1st company i'm working with) tu tak de la best sgt, but i still mizz d moment me as a worker as asst eng.. bgelumang dgn programming coding smua tu.. tu la ms keje nk cuti... dh cuti nk keje.. yup thts me! again my bad habits menyesal benda yg dh lepas... and one more words tht always got to my mind.."KALAU la"... see not even in a paragraph can know my bad habits...
FeEllINg right now??? words can say " penAntiaN SaTu PeNyeKsaaN..", and others perception towards me today... "taKUt menGHadapi kegagAlan".. sape yg ska gagal.. 4 me once i fail its hard 4 me to gothrough this life.. facing d world and people arrounds... As d nightmare i had be4, the impact still haunted me till now..

so what else can I say??? am i too secretive?? for now i take this answer "YES", since i hate n dont dare to tell my feel, share my personal life to others.. the one that I dare enough to share with is only and d only is my mom.. she d one know my frenz d boy around me even some girl said they feel uneasy to share thiz kind of story with their mom but not me.... Since i think my mom is d best person that i ever know.. Thanks IBU.............

Mind warm up......

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My Page Pet

angie...

ello.... today i got new angie as my pet... hope it will life well under my care...

new chance?????

huuhuhuhuhuhu.............first time in my life kuar malam sorang2..drive sorang2....nothing to say.. may be ibu dh bleh pcaya my driving skills.. n my teenage life.. but kuar malm ni juz nk open mind untuk satu pluang baru yg still got BIG question mark dlm kpala???? since me myself hard to put trust n believes to others sbab semua org ckp sy tak excited to grab the chance...
talking about trust... trusr=pcaya.... memang satu perkara yg susah sya nk bagi kat orang.. for me tak de org yg sya bleh pcaya sepenuhnya...maybe some said its hard for me to get along with others... since my experience once kta tlampau pcaya dkat orang tp bila kita dikhianati ia adalah satu rasa yg paling sakit=pedi..etc... so smpai skarang there is no words of best friend in my life.. for me best friend == kwan yg kta bleh pcaya utuk share ap yg kita rasa n dia patut fham diri kita and kita sendiri bleh rasa ap yg dia rasa n fham dia spenuhnya... may be my personality too secretive make a s big wall or border for me to share my feeling and others trying to understand me... what can i say thats me.... so thatz make the chance leave me with A big question mark there.......???????????my head..huhuhuhuhuhuh

sad..sad..bad..bad...situation

uhuhuuhuh.... 2 minggu ni melalui saat2 yg paling downnn... dalm hidup, takde kata atau ayat atau atau ap2 nak di gambarkan..nk dikata kan tentang my feeling right now... kadang2 satu miracle yg boleh buat masa ni pgi ke 2 minggu sebelum ni.. tapi bila fikir2 balik berdasarkan pemikiran rasional dan seorang muslim ini yg dikatakan takdir.. faith in our life journey.. but the fact is macamana nk terima kenyataan ...dan nk menghadapi kenyataan.. may be sebab aku ni terlampau mengikut perasaan( orang yg kata).. tak tahan mental torture.. so now time for me to gain my energy and build up my strength... bak kata org... life juz begin... wake up adie.. there is a lot of trials waiting for u in the futures.. so kalau skarang dh jatuh tersungkur bleh ker aku hadapi semua trial, cabaran rintangan n wateva in the future??????